UNBEARABLE

I CANT ANGELS
I CANT GET ON THE SCALES
I TRIED LAST NIGHT BUT I JUST STOOD THERE
STARING AT THEM
IM SCARED.

SCARED IVE GAINED
WHAT IF I HAVE?
WILL IT HELP TO SEE MY FAILURE?
MAKE ME TRY HARDER
PUSH MYSELF F U R T H E R
OR WILL IT MAKE ME BINGE?
IVE BEEN DOING THAT ALOT RECENTLY
ITS LIKE I CANT CONTROL MY BODY
MY MIND IS SCREAMING AT ME TO STOP
BUT MY BODY IS MOVING BY ITSELF

WHY CANT THIS BE EASY
WHO MADE IT SO HARD?
I NEED TO FIND MY WILL
MY WANTING, I NEED IT BACK

WATER FASTING TODAY
AND FOR THE FORESEEABLE FUTURE
HOPEFULLY UNTIL THURSDAY EVENING
THINK I CAN DO IT ANGELS?
THATS 70 HOURS ROUGHLY.
MY RECORDS 80 SO I SHUD BE ABLE TO DO IT.

TIME FOR COMMENT REPLIES :)

LETO
THANKS FOR THE ADVISE SWEETIE
WE HAVE ALOT OF NUTS ABOUT THE HOUSE
WALNUTS AND ALMONDS ETC
I THINK ILL TRY SOME OF THOSE
AFTER MY FAST OF COURSE :)
MUCH LOVE XX

UNBEAUTIFUL
THANK YOU :)
I WAS SO HAPPY TO SEE THAT ON THE SCALES
NOW IM JUST SCARED OF THE NEXT NUMBER
MUCH LOVE XX

crashxdburn
yeah i sure dont miss working in a pub
well i do, alot, but not when it comes to waitressing
its all just too tempting
and my will power wasnt that great back then! lol
my sister is a pain in my ass. thats our relationship :)
i broke it sort of correctly. haha
well it definitely got broke :/
as you can see in my post im trying it again
going all out this time :)
all my family eat fairly healthily
its just the quantity they eat that lets them down
its ridiculous lol
i havnt commented on yours for ages sorry!
Ill comment soon promise! :D
much love and be strong. xx

nasimiyu
thanks you sugar :)
much love for the support sweetie
ill deffo need it all this week! lol
yeah i just keep thinking that
'you wont remember, you know you wont'
and it makes it okay to miss it
when you truly miss something
you miss it non-stop and you always remember
but with food i never do
i cant remember what flavour crisps i ate last week
so why did i eat them? see my point? lol
much love and thank you xx

Bella
Thank you for following me!
glad you stumbled upon my ramblings :)
You'll do great sweetie!
we never know how strong we are until we have to be
When i was up near that weight
i didnt realise how simple it was
I mean right now if you fast a day
you'll lose like 7 or 8 pounds
it starts to slow down once you get lower
but getting down here feels so great its worth it!
much love and be strong my sweet. xx

much love for all the support!
i dont know what id do without you Angels
Ill try to weigh myself soon, for you
xoxo